Politics Gone Fowl

So, apparently an e-mail from a person who doesn’t live in Fairfield is responsible for the city council passing on a strategy to save our golf course from further damage from some persistent geese.

The inaction by the city council leaves their counterparts on the park district board with a couple hundred geese, and mounting damage.

I went out to visit the flock yesterday. They are not pleasant birds. In fact, they are fowl.

The only strategy that appeared to have a chance of ridding the course of the scourge was a few shotguns and plenty of shotgun shells. Other ideas included air cannons and possibly a form of chemical warfare.

I believe it was in 1983 when literally hundreds of thousands of cowbirds, a form of starling, landed on the city’s west side and stayed and stayed and stayed. The city tried everything including air canons….which proved ineffective. The birds were smart enough to know the sound wasn’t really anything more than an annoyance. They would take flight…then just land back where they were roosting.

To suggest that shooting at the golf course geese is a redneck solution is to suggest that the best experts with the state are idiots…because they can’t come up with a better solution.

Remember, this is a golf course that struggles to break even. In fact, it doesn’t. And now, because of the power of an e-mail, the grounds will continue to be assaulted by large, smelly, leaking fowl intent on drilling holes in the turf in search of bugs.

I only wish my words held the same kind of clout with the city council as the goose lover from out of town.