Ladies Rule

My accountant looked at me in disbelief.

My attire begged his question. 

What’s going on? He couldn’t believe I was actually sweating….and it wasn’t because of my finances. It was because I was seeing him after a one-hour Crossfit session.

I suspect my advanced age, my obvious waistline bulk and longstanding opposition to physical fitness were key factors in his disbelief.

Why?, he asked. Why did I hit the accelerator and go from zero to 80 miles-per-hour?

The simple truth is, I got scared during this summer of discontent. My health is shaky at best. It was time. I knew the instructor. She seemed compassionate. It worked with my schedule….come on….it was only three days a week. Right?

Here’s the truth. I will not surrender. I will not quit despite the fact that this class is kicking my enlarged behind. There are only four people in my class and the other three are women. I can’t hide during class. Trust me, I’ve tried.

The ladies can out-stretch, out lift…..out do me in every exercise. They pick up 25-pound kettle bells and I pick up 15 pounders. When we are done with each session, they help pick up my weights because I’m too spent to put them back on the rack.

Things got better last week. Another guy joined. He appears to be in his mid-80s. At the moment, I can out-lift the old fella.

I’m counting on him not improving. If he does… I’m toast.