How I spent my holiday vacation by Mike Dreith

Some people like puzzles…others are partial to board games.

But my most challenging and time consuming pursuit is understanding and learning how to use modern technology. Remember, I am a digital immigrant…..not a digital native like my sons.

Each year, during the holiday break, I usually have several technology issues to wrestle to the ground. And it usually takes time. Lots of time. But when I solve the puzzle, I get a rush of endorphins like I got back in the days I would run for exercise.

This break I have had a couple of projects….and I nailed them. But I spent hours. My kids would have taken minutes….seconds.

We bought a used vehicle so Carol could have four-wheel drive on her way to work in the winter. It is a 2012 Ford Explorer. And it’s loaded with technology. Understand, I never buy a new car. My 2007 Jeep was formerly owned by my Dad….and bequeathed to me by my sister. The most technical thing about the Jeep is the digital readout on the odometer.

I tried to learn the technology on the fly….literally while I drove the SUV. Big mistake. I decided to stop pushing all of the buttons when I accidently called my insurance agent on I-44. I was trying to turn on the heat in my seat. Oooops.

The only way to learn all of the tech features was to park in our driveway, and open the owner’s manual to learn about the entertainment, navigation and climate controls. This SUV can make you breakfast. It has a rear camera so I can hear an alarm right before I see myself hit our garbage can.

I am sure the neighbors believe Carol has thrown me out of the house to live in the Ford. I sit there for hours and speak to the dashboard.

“Hey Marge, have you noticed the Dreith guy is back in his Explorer talking to himself?” is probably the breakfast conversation across the street. “And he gets angry and pounds his hand on the steering wheel every few minutes. Clearly, she threw him out of the house. Poor guy.”

I sit and use the voice commands to operate the radio, Sirius, the heater and setting up the GPS. All of it is in the dash, just waiting for me to command it. It’s freaking amazing.

So, I think, after hours of driveway time…..I am one with the Explorer. But the neighbors do not make eye contact anymore.

I also broke my rule to stop shopping on Craigslist. Bought a few cameras and lenses to add to my camera drawer.

I am a Canon guy. I bought a 20D in a McDonald’s parking lot. The ad said there were five lenses…..I took the bait. Only two work on the camera body. Shame on me.

I also had a clandestine encounter in a Motor Mart parking lot in Pacific. Bought a Sureshot advertised to connect to my smart phone. Unfortunately, Canon stopped support after I-phone went above the 8.0 update. I’m at 10.2. Double shame on me.

At 59, you would think I would understand the adage----“If a deal looks too good to be true, it usually is.”

Just pay an extra fifty dollars and buy your technology at a store.

Next week I go back to work.

That gives me a few days to change the time on the digital clock in my Mancave….I need another rush of endorphins.

It blinks 12:00 at me.

At least it is correct twice a day.